Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Jake Bribes Tiny Policeman with Quarters

Jake Gyllenhaal, who breaks the law all of the time, broke the law again yesterday by thinking that just because he's got a motorcycle now, he doesn't have to pay the parking meter.

But this tiny, tiny policeman told him that he has to pay 25 cents just like the rest of us, because even though Jake now has a beard and a motorcycle and generally looks like a Hells Angel, even badasses can have their vehicles towed.

Anyway, let's look at some more pictures of Jake, 'cause it's not like we have anything else to talk about OH WAIT WE DO.

Nice going, Gylls.  You leave me high and dry for months and now you're just all over the damn place.  Well, I hope you're enjoying making me rush around like this and put up four posts in 24 hours.  I'm trying to go over design proofs for my book right now but noooo.  You just haaaavvve to be the center of attention.  (Actors!)

And the long anticipated motorcycle shot for the win:

MORE UPDATES (because we live in a world where Jake news now comes to us hourly):

The Love and Other Drugs Official Website is now up!  So check it out and marvel at how there's absolutely nothing on it.

And then "Like" it on Facebook.  You know you want to.

More motorcycle pics here!


Call Me Mo August 17, 2010 at 10:20 AM  

The motorcycle, beard, and that pistachio shirt?! It's too much. He most def does not look frumpy here. I'm swooning so hard right now.

Vanessa August 17, 2010 at 10:26 AM  

LMFAO, PG! Epic WIN on the FIRST of today's posts! "Tiny Policeman", HAHAHA, that's too effing funny! You rock!

Well, just when I THOUGHT I was going to be able to concentrate on work, I get hit this morning with BAD BIKER JAKEY! Be still my beating heart! LOVE the Triumph, dude! Excellent choice, although I'm more partial to Harleys, any bike is cool in my book. OK, absolutely loving the thicker more luxurious hair, but on the head, NOT so much on the face! Seriously, are ya trying to go for the ZZ Top look or what? I mean, you rocked the "Sharp Dressed Man" look, but PLEASE, no Billy Gibbons lookalike, one is QUITE enough, thank you. >;-P

Sasha,  August 17, 2010 at 10:31 AM  

squeeeeeeeeeee - Jake on a bike ... it cant get any better :)

(ohoho I'm sorry - a little trimming or full shaving is still much appreciated)

gyllenhaalisgr8 August 17, 2010 at 10:37 AM  

I don't know if this would bother Jake or not, but with that effing beard his dad looks younger than he does!

Sasha,  August 17, 2010 at 10:38 AM  

erm, can anyone from the US tell me what that is about the quarter? Didn't he used the "parking clock"? Is that thingy broken? Hä???

BeautifulMess74 August 17, 2010 at 11:05 AM  

Sasha, I don't know what a parking clock is. But here in the US in streets such as this (downtown) we use parking meters, that's the machine shown in front of Jake.

Which basically means we put a nickles, dime, or a quarter (all coin) in the meter, and it gives us a certain amount of time to park at said spot.

If we go over, and a parking meter maid or in this case police officer notices--we can get a ticket and have to pay a fine.

I often times put in more time than I am planning on staying, say from a half hour to a full hour or so. Just so I don't have this issue. Hope this helped explain things.

PG, the post was funny. I especially thought the "tiny tiny policeman" was hilarious. I thought this man couldn't get any hotter, but DAMN. Now he rides a motorcycle?!

I have goosebumps.


Call Me Mo August 17, 2010 at 11:22 AM  

Now we need an action shot. Could you imagine him hitching his leg over the bike? PG, you need to school these paps on the shots that are really important.

Anonymous,  August 17, 2010 at 12:05 PM  

Loving the bike pics but what I'd love even more is if someone could photoshop out that woman in the 4th pic of the "Love and Other Drugs: Jake's Idea of Comedy" post. Talk about chest porn! That has to be one of the most beautiful shots of Jake I've ever seen. *sigh* *drool* *swoon*,etc.


Sasha,  August 17, 2010 at 12:19 PM  

BeautifulMess74 thanks - that helped a lot ... and I meant to say parking meter (but I couldn't remember the right US-word so I translated the german parkuhr = parking clock ;) lol )

omg I thing I added you on twitter and you get all my non-jake tweets now - I hope you are not tooooooo bored - but you can always tell me to go away ;)

Becky Heineke August 17, 2010 at 12:25 PM  

I just added links to the LAOD official website and official Facebook page to the bottom of this post. WHEN WILL IT END??? (Hopefully never. :))

Mo, I agree that this was just not a top notch job and basically the *entire world* would be a better place if I was in charge of all of it, all of the time. :D

Lorelai, that was a MOST admirable and succinct summation of U.S. parking laws! :)

Olympia, OH were that woman to be removed, what a glorious shot that would be... (Her hand/arm kind of makes it look like he has a weird double-chest/stomach thing going on...which is as legitimate a reason as any to get her out of there. ;))

Anonymous,  August 17, 2010 at 1:02 PM  

Oh! no I don't like that horriable big bread!!! older than his father! ><

Call Me Mo August 17, 2010 at 4:27 PM  

I can't decide which site I like better now. Jake's "official" website or the Love and Other Drugs website. It's pretty stiff competition.

I think I am alone here, but *cough*

Vanessa August 17, 2010 at 5:05 PM  

Love the "Team Bearded Jake", Mo!

That's too funny! I am more "Team Scruffy Jake", though.

Eeep, WTF am I saying anyway? I am "Team ANY Jake" if I could get a piece of that, oh HELL yeah, I would take "big huge ZZ Top bearded Jake" & all.


Becky Heineke August 17, 2010 at 5:33 PM  

I'm not a huge fan of the beard. But I AM a huge fan of Jake doing whatever the hell he wants in between movies. :) (And I'm a big fan of Mo's graphic!)

Honestly, I thought there'd be more comments on this post. I think you've all been spoiled with the porn and now it's like motorcycles and parking meters don't even impress you anymore!!!! :D

Vanessa August 17, 2010 at 5:42 PM  

Well, I know you ain't referring to MOI, PG, since I can't ever stop talking. Sheesh, & now with these latest Jakey escapades, I am even more hopeless. Jake porn be damned! >;-)

Call Me Mo August 17, 2010 at 5:56 PM  

Just for you, PG. (Good thing my job doesn't keep me more occupied. ;])

Let's believe that the pics were just so grand it has rendered people speechless.

Becky Heineke August 17, 2010 at 6:04 PM  

I am laughing. So hard. Right now.

OHEMGEE BRILLIANT. See, that's exactly what I'm talking about. He walks around looking like a million bucks when he's selling us his craft, but goddammit, if he wants to grow a lumberjack beard and pick his nose when he's off duty, I'm ALL FOR IT. (Though admittedly there are some things he should save for when no one's looking...nose-picking among them. :D)

And Vanessa, NO, definitely not talking about you! ;D I was just comparing comment numbers from over the weekend and thinking that the new week, while news-filled, has not attracted the same level of enthusiasm. I blame it on the week itself, as weekends in general are just more exciting. ;)

KD,  August 17, 2010 at 7:20 PM  



SOMEONE STOP THIS INSANITY NOW. Gylls on a motorcycle is just too hot for the world at this moment.


KD,  August 17, 2010 at 7:25 PM  

MO. Your second graphic is too damn hilarious. saving that shit right now.


PG - Sorry I haven't been commenting that much lately. I've been ridiculously jet lagged. I think I slept 14 hours today...

KD,  August 17, 2010 at 7:26 PM  


Insect bits is just gross. LOL

Vanessa August 17, 2010 at 7:31 PM  

LMFAO, KD! I don't mean to laugh at your insect "BITS", but you are just too funny sometimes. Geez, sounds like you are really having a large time. Damn, take it easy with the killer insects & catch plenty of Z's so you can be fresh for more stalking of Gylls. Ha, where in the hell are you now, anyway? You are in the future to us here in the states, right? haha, that is always so weird to me that people on the other side of the world are a day ahead of me. & always one step ahead too!

KD,  August 17, 2010 at 7:42 PM  

LOL. No problem Vanessa. I always try to add humor to everything I do and/or say and/or write.

Right now I'm back in the states. I just got back on Sunday at 23:52. So I technically had two Sundays. It was weird checking ISJ at 5 am and finding a new post. Its weird for me too, although I get more and more used to it as I continue to travel.

Vanessa August 17, 2010 at 7:48 PM  

So glad you made it back safe & sound! Now you can concentrate much more heavily on the STALKING OF JAKE.

He certainly has been giving us much fun in the past couple of days. Loving that bike, that is SO hot! Always been a bike lover & would give ANYTHING to hop on the back of that bad boy with "Bad Boy Gylls" at the helm. Hmmm, makes me shiver just thinking about it. YUM. YUM. & YUM.

Becky Heineke August 17, 2010 at 9:12 PM  

KD, are you back from your crazyawesome vacation then?!

(You've been doing unbelievably well with commenting, by the way, and I hope I didn't sound ungrateful, 'cause I thought when you left we wouldn't hear from you for forever!! And now everyone will think that I want them to comment OR ELSE. But I really don't care! I was just surprised that a motorcycle didn't rouse up more conversation and I shouldn't have said anything I think eek kbaithanx. :))

KD,  August 17, 2010 at 9:48 PM  

Lololol. Nah PG. Speak your mind. Preach it girl. There ain't no harm done making an observation.

I did think comments were down a bit too, but then again I never really had an accurate data sample.

Though it does seem that since I've returned a bunch of new people have started commenting! Very cool, very cool.

And thanks Vanessa. Now I CAN return to heavily stalking Jake. RIGHT ON TIME, IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF.

Becky Heineke August 17, 2010 at 10:31 PM  

Our family is expanding, it's true!!! I am beyond excited by this. :)

(And your timing *totally* could not have been better. :D)

Sam August 17, 2010 at 11:30 PM  

JAKE ON A BIKE! Im torn between the unbelievable hottness and Jakes life in jeopardy!

I think in the meantime... while there is pictures i will think about the unbelievable hotness... And like Call Me Mo said earlier, i want a step by step guide to how exactly he gets on that bike ;)
p.s. Im not a bearded Jake fan, but i must admit, Clean Shaven (yes they get Capital Letters) Jake would look too pretty getting on that bike!

Nicole Z. August 18, 2010 at 3:23 AM  

This is Jake's daddy on one of this photos, isn't it? I have to admit that I like it, when Jake has some hair in his face but this... phew... it seems a bit too much. But I really like the motorcycle ;)

Anonymous,  August 18, 2010 at 7:12 AM  

Oh! Jake on a bike! so cooool!!!
My heart's thumping. Then swooned...
Two shot pic, Jake and his dad is very gorgeous!
Thank you PG!


sumi k August 18, 2010 at 10:09 AM  

a few things.

1. i am totally team bearded jake. i love it hard.

however. what frightens me the most.. is what it REALLY just a tiny policeman, or in our jake drought has he suffered an acute case of gigantism!?!?!?! is he going to look down on all of us little people now? is the beard something he grew to seem more like 'one of the people'? so many questions!!!

Gylls, i need answers!

Becky Heineke August 18, 2010 at 11:51 AM  

^^^ You ALWAYS bring up the best points! In keeping with our Jake-is-Dead theory, MAYBE he's been replaced by Paul Bunyan. Stranger things have happened.

Nicole (yay, so glad to see you commented!!), that is indeed Jake's dad! Good old Stephen... :)

Vanessa August 18, 2010 at 11:56 AM  

LMFAO! The funny thing is he really DOES look extraordinarily LARGE in that pic next to the bike & the cop. Paul Bunyan, indeed!!

hahahaha **gigantism**, that just cracked me up, sumi k!

sumi k August 18, 2010 at 7:16 PM  

near my house, there is a farm where they sometimes sell pumpkins, corn, and gardening stuff. for years they had a gigantic paul bunyan statue standing outside of it. i shit you not, one month ago, it disappeared.


Becky Heineke August 18, 2010 at 7:32 PM  


(For real, I am laughing *out loud* right now at this turn of events. :D)

Sasha,  August 19, 2010 at 11:40 AM  

I just got thru the comments - they are so funny ladies LMAO!!!!

You really made my day since I'm sitting on a timebomb (US big brother > not literally dont come and get me) waiting for it to explode and bang me into pieces. I guess that's what they call "rough day at the office".

PG I'd love to comment more often but you guys really say it all - so be sure I'm here daily :D if not several times a day

Sasha,  August 19, 2010 at 11:43 AM  

that police officer really looks tiny - but he is standing on the street (see 2nd picture, his foot is at the bikes wheel) and Jake is on the sidewalk - that's like what 15cm difference in the US????? :D

Becky Heineke August 19, 2010 at 12:15 PM  

HAHA, Sasha! :D It definitely gives him a little bit of added height, for sure. :) And I really do appreciate you reading! I wish I hadn't said anything about the comments...sometimes there's nothing to say, I know. :) And this post wound up having lots of comments anyway! I spoke too soon... ;)

(I hope your day gets better!! :-/)

Katie,  August 19, 2010 at 3:51 PM  

Word must've gotten out...Jake must know about my new-found affinity for motorcycles. How nice of him to not make me wait forever to see him on one.

Katie,  August 19, 2010 at 3:54 PM  

You all bring up very good and incredibly hilarious points! I'm sorry to say, PG, but you are so right. After all the LaOD porn, its very hard to come back from that. I think we'd all agree that Motorcycle Jake, though, is a valiant effort!!!

Becky Heineke August 19, 2010 at 9:48 PM  

He tries so hard to impress all of us! (And usually pulls it off quite admirably, if I do say so myself. ;))

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