Friday, August 6, 2010

John Barrowman Crosses the Line of Decency, Crosses Back Over, Then Crosses to the First Side Again

A long time ago (June), noted human John Barrowman gained minor, short-lived, blogosphere fame for saying he wanted to see Jake Gyllenhaal naked.  "Just take your clothes off, Jake!" said Barrowman, to some interview person.  He also expressed interest in kissing Jake.

In related news, the sky is blue.

Barrowman, whose current day job is "actor on ABC's tawdry Sunday evening soap Desperate Housewives" slunk back into obscurity for the next month or so (out of shame, no doubt, after Jake did not respond to his advances)...



Earlier this week, Barrowman once again made the blogging circuit afer insisting that Jake play him in a biopic of his life.  Should a biopic ever be made.  Which is unlikely.  But just in case the opportunity comes up, it should be Jake.  Whom I'm sure he still wants to kiss.

Dear John Barrowman,

I think it's really weird that you want to make out with yourself.  And to quote a wise woman (me), "If you want to get Jake's attention, I can't think of anything less effective than going the blogging route."

Luv 4-eva,
PG (peace)

John Barrowman has now surpassed Kris Allen as the Worst Celebrity Who Ever Lived.

Speaking of Jake (as we often do around here), there are only 39 days left to pre-order your Prince of Persia DVD or Blu-ray!  Which is why I have now sold out and put little link-y thingies on the sidebar for your convenience.

(Totally kidding about selling out.  I never had any scruples or decency to begin with.)

Also, after a few inquiries that made me think that people might actually still be interested, the Jake Watch Store has recently been redesigned and restocked (now 50% less likely to be breaking copyright laws)!  So check it out!  Jake himself is, of course, a big fan of my T-shirt designing skillz:

Death to Barrowman, and enjoy your Friday!

Original Barrowman pic from HERE.  Thanks to Vanessa for letting me know he was back to his old tricks!


Gracie August 6, 2010 at 11:46 AM  

Love that last shirt :D the original gay cowboy :D and that dude needs to back away from our precious jake >_>

Voulez Vouz August 6, 2010 at 11:50 AM  

*grabs pitchfork and torch* DEATH TO BARROWMAN! The nerve of the man! There are millions, MILLIONS of us who would love to kiss Jake. How dare he attempt to skip the line? You'll get yours one day, Barrowman...That day is near!

Sasha,  August 6, 2010 at 12:59 PM  

LMAO - that shirt is so cool ....

gyllenhaalisgr8 August 6, 2010 at 1:03 PM  

This is great! When I posted the Inquisitr page about John Barrowman wanting Jake to play his life, I posted a comment, and to date it is still the only comment:

The story of his life? What is he, twelve now? I think it's rather presumptuous of him to choose Jake Gyllenhaal, like Jake doesn't have a zillion movies in the works. Maybe Zach Braff would be a more appropriate candidate."

Now that I read that he wants Jake, possible perpetuating the horrid rumor that Jake is gay, line me up a pitch fork too, PG!

Becky Heineke August 6, 2010 at 3:21 PM  

Barrowman is totally blacklisted for life. THE NERVE OF HIM.

I'm not going to lie, I'm very proud of my gay cowboy shirt. And I'm even more proud that that picture shows up all over the place and NOT ONE PERSON has ever questioned whether Jake's really wearing such a thing... ;)

Becky Heineke August 6, 2010 at 3:26 PM  

^^^ Meaning that he would be awesome enough to wear the design, not that my Photoshop job was all that great. ('Cause it's not.)

Nothing Really Matters August 6, 2010 at 4:02 PM  

^^ Dude that cracks me up every time that people think he's wearing it!

Sam August 6, 2010 at 4:39 PM  

39 days till my birthday! And i STILL wear my Mrs Gyllenhaal shirt to jake movies! Yiew!!

p.s. Love the new font on that shirt!!!

Becky Heineke August 6, 2010 at 4:45 PM  

I feel bad because the old font was so huge, it probably looked like crap! :( The quality of the graphics now are a lot better too. I kind of want to apologize to anyone who bought an old shirt and tell them they're 100% more awesome now!!

Sam, that's awesome because I still wear my gay cowboy shirt to all new Jake movies! :) I'm just sad I wasn't paying better attention because apparently every search engine ever has dropped me, and the shameless rip-offs are getting all the glory. :(

Vanessa August 6, 2010 at 8:37 PM  

OK, Barrowman, back the eff up, dude, if you know what's good for ya. (this is so upsetting to me as I am a big fan of his too, damn it) OK, I totally get it dude, I want to snog Jake myself, so I can relate. However, watch yourself, we protect our own & PG already has dibbs on him, so there.

On another note, totally love the T-shirts, & I do believe I must have one asap, PG. The ripoffs are so uncool, your design is way better anyway, I love love love the rainbow & all of it. I will wear it proudly to the next Jake movie... heheheh, won't that be confusing to the audience at LAOD??? Hah!

KD,  August 7, 2010 at 12:46 AM  

Hey, I say Kudos to Barrowman. Speak your mind bro. You can look but you can't touch though. Besides, Jake's property of PG already so...unless you want to be the adulterer. But then again, maybe you do.

I desire that shirt greatly.

NGL, I thought Jake wore it for real at one point too.

Off topic, the state of Jake/movie fandom has really deteriorated lately. I was on an PoP imdb forum trying to defend aspects of the movie (like the fact that Jake is NOT the sole reason the movie to "flopped") and some trolls come on by with vulgarity and name calling. -SIGH-. Decent discussions, where have thou gone?!

Vanessa August 7, 2010 at 12:57 AM  

I know, KD, right? The damn trolls at imdb make me crazy. I can't stop myself going over there to defend our guy & then can not believe what jackasses they truly are. I have vowed to stay away. Besides PoP was not a true flop, regardless of what they all say, $327 mil worldwide is NOT a flop. Unfortunately, the US did not like it so much for some reason, so whatever, it just means we won't get a sequel. OK, so? We know that PoP was a great romp, just what it was supposed to be. OK? OK. That's all. Night all.

Becky Heineke August 7, 2010 at 9:30 AM  

AH, this makes me so sad. :( I feel like it's been the elephant in the room ever since I started this blog that things are just not great in the fanbase right now. Where is the enthusiasm?! :(

But when it comes to people who spend their time bashing other people (and people they have no personal relationship with at that) on the internet, that's a whole other level of sad. I don't understand people who find joy in spreading negativity. And I fully admit that it's those very people who are the reason I sometimes limit where I go online...

KD,  August 7, 2010 at 9:53 AM  

I've always tried to keep the positive outlook that fandom can be a positive and encouraging place to be if one simply tries, but I seem to be getting proven wrong time and time again. It's happened in so many fandoms of mine that, I'll admit it, I was even reluctant to join this one for a while. (I followed Jake Watch for a while before it shut down but never commented in fear of TROLLS.)

Plus I keep thinking that imdb forums is a decent and respectable place but keep getting proven wrong. I mean, its one thing to disagree with another, but to personally BLAST someone is crossing a certain line imho.

Vanessa - SAME. I always want to try to defend Jake in some aspect, even when something he does or a movie he participates in raises flags. But then the trolling begins and I just give up. I mean, I admit I think some trolls are actually pretty funny here and there, but the majority of them are dimwits who can't even insult properly without using vulgarity.

PG - I limit myself as well now and am very wary of participating in various fandoms...


Phoebe,  August 8, 2010 at 12:52 PM  

That t-shirt is the finest t-shirt there ever was and ever will be. Period.

now 50% less likely to be breaking copyright laws


Anonymous,  December 2, 2010 at 7:25 AM  

Urgh. I googled John Barrownman and stumbled across this stupid blog. Ur all a bunch of idiotic assholes for taking what he said so seriously. This whole deluded ownership of Jake Gyllenhaal is, in all honesty, pretty damn pathetic. Get a life all you fools, and stop ragging on John Barrowman, who happens to be a legend in his own right. Not only is he a brilliant dramatic actor and singer, he's also one of the leading gay activists in the showbiz industry. But anywais, whatever, this comment is such a waste of time as I'm sure I'll be getting a lot angry retaliations. Oh well. Lets see who has the most violent reaction to this shall we. AND GO!

Becky Heineke December 2, 2010 at 9:29 AM  

^^^ This is hilarious. I can't believe you took this post seriously! HA!!!

Anonymous,  December 20, 2010 at 1:33 AM  

Here's the problem with making an entirely sarcastic article. Not everyone gets it. In other news, I fucking love JB. And as compared to Gyllenhall's HOLLYWOOD HERITAGE (in other words, it fell in my lap and thats what I'm going to be), he has a lot more going for him. For instance, his theatrical abilities and musical talent. (READ: HARD WORK TO GET WHERE HE IS.)

Becky Heineke December 20, 2010 at 10:10 AM  

^^^ Again with the unnecessary hostility! :) I think you'll find that actually every single person who reads this blog agrees *completely* with what you've said.

This blog exists to promote a book that I wrote about another Jake blog, which I was a part of back in 2006/2007. Entries such as this one are written in the vein of the original blog, which (more so than anything) made fun of people's slavish devotion to any one single celebrity.

The book explains in a very detailed way how I came to see through the myth of the Gyllenhaal family, and I use that as a platform to suggest that ALL of us are a little too invested in Hollywood, pop culture, and the internet. :)

The people who read this blog have a genuine affection for Jake, but of all the Jake sites that are out there, this is definitely NOT the one for those who think he's perfect or for those who would argue against what you wrote above. Sorry if anything written here upset just dropped into the middle of a years-long, very established way of commenting on the concept of celebrity and I think you misinterpreted what really goes on here. :)

Anonymous,  December 30, 2010 at 12:52 PM  

everyone who commented hate about barrowman need to calm down. seriously, he was joking...some people have been known to do that occasionally.
p.s. dudes, this jake guy (not a very important celeb apparently) has been in like 6 films (idk for sure coz im not cool enough to look him up) whilst barrowman has dont musical theatre, television, films, music etc. so much better than this mr G

Vanessa December 30, 2010 at 1:09 PM  

^^^ Excuse me, anon, but we all knew here that what Barrowman said & did was all in jest. That is the spirit of this blog anyway, for fun & joking around, none of what was said about him was serious. I personally love John & always have. & FYI, Jake has made a lot more than 6 movies, he starred in 15 & had smaller parts in a few others, & has done stage as well. Not to mention, he has also won a BAFTA & been nominated for an Oscar & GG & won numerous other film awards. You really ought to read some of the comments before commenting yourself, because if you had, you would have already seen that this was just sarcastic humor & not serious at all. Cheers.

Anonymous,  January 3, 2011 at 7:45 AM  

^^^^as i said, i didnt look up JG before commenting so i have no idea what/ how many films he hsa been in. thank you for informing me.
i am so sorry that i didnt understand that you were all being not retardd, sorry.
btw im could be wrong but i doubt that youre on first name terms with JB

Anonymous,  May 27, 2011 at 4:16 AM  


Anonymous,  July 31, 2011 at 10:49 PM  

Apparently you have missed the fact that Barrowman has had 2 best selling autobiographies and is one of the finest singers and actors on either side of the ocean. More importantly, you missed the humor of his comment since he is married to his long time partner! So don't worry homophobics JB won't be stealing any man away from you, he has the one he loves.
I've honestly never read such trash talking on a blog before and will be glad to wash my hands of these absurd comments about an actor you obviously know nothing about! I admire Jake as well but don't trash another human in order to make the other look good. It backfires.

Purpledragon August 5, 2011 at 8:41 PM  

Okay, first I wanna say that I understand that this article was meant to be sarcastic. I'm not sure if John actually said those things, (and if he did, well...I forgive him.) But this article was far from funny. Especially when you wrote "Death to Barrowman". How dare you write something so horrible. I don't care if it was a joke, you don't f**king joke about death. It doesn't matter WHO it is!
I don't like Justin Bieber: I think he undermines celebrities who actually WORK to earn their fame. I would NEVER say, "death to Bieber."
I'm not sure who this "Jake" guy is, but I know John Barrowman. John is and extremely talented, charming and outspoken man. He's worked hard to get where he is today, and only asks for respect in return. If he DID say those things, I'm sure he'd be embarrassed of what he said. He's not a rude person, he's very mature.
Show him at least a LITTLE respect.

Unknown December 30, 2012 at 2:32 PM  


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Anonymous,  December 20, 2013 at 5:08 AM  

You are so stupid. Barrowman is a man with class. His sense of humor is over you lack of perception. You must be a kid or something...I don't know. Maybe you just don't have ability of thinking.
But this is what I still can forgive, stupid person is not that rare phenomenon. wrote "Death to..." and this is HATE. This is disgusting and makes me sick, no matter it's about Barrowman or some other...Go to doctor. Or to sarcasm is very poor. These all praised post anonymous...are yours,I guess.
Agnes Wallis.

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