Some Fake Jake Wants You To Vote For The Real Jake For The Teen Choice Awards

Geez, these Twitter Jakes are persistent!  Just since the last time I wrote an entry about Fake Twitter Jakes, there are even more Fake Twitter Jakes.  Let's check out what "JakeGyllenhaal_" has been up to in the past few days (he protects his tweets, though I have the honor of being amongst the roughly 2000 people he has graciously allowed into his circle):

FAKE JAKE FAIL.  (Though, to be fair, I have never once seen a Fake Jake win.)

Generally related to all of this, Jake really is up for a Teen Choice Award or two, so if you'd like to do your part to place Jake in a room full of screaming teenagers, go HERE!  He's nominated for Choice Movie Actor:  Fantasy (Prince of Persia) and Choice Movie Actor:  Drama (Brothers).  (Who knew Brothers was such a hit with the teen set?)  Not to dash anyone's hopes, but he's up against RPatz and Taylor Lautner in the first category and RPatz and Channing Tatum in the second, so...yeah.  He doesn't have a cold chance in hell.

But we can vote for him anyway.

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Jake Gyllenhaal *Very Concerned* About the Quality of Fake Jakes on Twitter

Just look at this face:

If that's not the face of someone distraught over half-assed Twitter impersonators, I don't know what is!

Being the person who literally wrote the book on Fake Jakes on social networking sites, I share Jake's concern.

The latest moderately-successful Twitter-Jake was the tiresome "JBGyllenhaal" who, like the good fake that he was, sounded absolutely nothing like Jake, attracted hordes of followers anyway, and then was kicked off Twitter for being lame.  Now he has reinvented himself as (I'm not kidding) JBGyllenhaal2, so don't follow him, because even for a Fake Jake, that's a really stupid Twitter name.

Also to be put on your No Follow List:

1.  "Mirkinsrock," who fails our authenticity test because he appears to be an idiot.

2.  "MrGyllenhaal," who looks to be a fan of BobVila.com.  We won't follow him because that's just sad.

3.  "jake_gyllenhaal," who does nothing except post paparazzi pictures and write tweets to himself.  I'm not convinced this person understands Twitter (although, to be fair, who among us does?).

Indeed, the sad fact is that while the medium of social networking may have changed over the years, the quality of Fake Jakes has not.  The best way to determine if the Jake you're following on Twitter is real is this:  IT'S NOT.

(Though if you were looking for an example, THIS is the level of devotion we should all learn to expect from Jake when it comes to communing with us lowly beings on the internet.)

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