Jake Gyllenhaal Just Stone Cold Beating Up On A Guy

This is a picture of Jake beating up an interviewer from The Times Online because the guy was all like "aw, man, Jake is soooo sensitive, I should see if I can make him cry."  Literally, this is how the article begins.  No wonder Jake beat him up.

Also of interest in this interview:

- The interviewer uses the adjective "bikini-waxed" to describe Jake, leaving us in the audience to ponder just what kind of setting this interview took place in...

- The interviewer, who apparently writes bad erotica on the side, describes Jake as having "implausibly overpumped muscles almost ripping apart the seams of his army-green T-shirt" and then follows up by suggesting he has the look of someone who would "rather be at home, writing poetry."  (Stephen shout-out?!)  Yes, that is Jake:  the hairless, muscular, long-haired, sensitive, single lad with a poetry fetish.  God, I could sell that to Harlequin and make MILLIONS...

- Continuing his established tradition of using inflated adjectives to describe Jake, the interviewer comes up with "antiseptically professional" and I will cry myself to sleep every night for the rest of my life for not being the one to have written that.

-  Without a trace of irony, the interviewer calls Jake "precocious," apparently overlooking the fact that of the two of them, Jake was not the one fantasizing about poetry and throwing around words like "antiseptically."

All in all, the dude probably did deserve a punch in the face.  But the interview's worth a read anyway!

Thanks to coffeecat for the tip!

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