Let's Talk Taylor Swift
Jake Gyllenhaal and Taylor Swift MAY OR MAY NOT maybe be allegedly dating. Maybe.
On a scale of 1 - 10...
The level to which I find this believable: 2
The level to which the two of them as a couple makes sense: 5 (See below.)
The level to which I care: -4 (Calculated by dividing my negative interest in Taylor by my low- to mid-level interest in Jake, which is directly proportional to the public's interest in him at any given time and thus reflective of my own personal gain.)
WHY THIS COUPLE MAKES SENSE:
1. Generally speaking, Taylor falls neatly within the limited range of Jake's Ideal Woman Specifications. Blonde hair? Check. Blue eyes? Check. More famous than he is? Double-check.
2. Taylor is 20 years old. All 20-year-old girls love Jake Gyllenhaal.
3. Jake is about 9 months past due for a rebound and nothing says "I was burned by an older woman who told me she wasn't looking to get married and then turned around and immediately got engaged to some other random dude" like dating on the opposite end of the age spectrum.
WHY THIS COUPLE DOESN'T MAKE SENSE:
1. IT'S JAKE GYLLENHAAL AND TAYLOR SWIFT.
IS THIS A PUBLICITY STUNT?
Obviously. Her album dropped yesterday, he's kick-starting his Love & Other Drugs promotional tour as we speak. They've been seen together (apple-picking!? that's so lame it's worthy of me making it up as a parody) and photographed together (such things never happen accidentally). And with Reese on the cover of US Weekly with her engagement news and Jake in need of something other than the Prince of Persia disaster for people to talk about while he does his Love & Other Drugs publicity rounds, this is stage-crafted perfection.
IS IT WORKING?
Maybe. Since the story "broke" on Perez, the numbers for the (now estranged) Love & Other Drugs Facebook page have jumped. The rumor has also spread faster and wider than the comparable Rachel Bilson and Isabel Lucas rumors from this summer. The difference here is twofold: not only are there are pictures (meaning both parties are complicit in spreading the story), but in this scenario, Jake is the lesser star. Jake's modus operandi is to attach himself to higher profile celebrities and let the women steer the publicity campaign. Jake can't even be bothered to pay someone else to run an official website for him, so it's always safe to assume that in terms of getting the news out, he's the one following and not leading.
And lucky him, Taylor's on fire right now. This has already gotten Jake more press than he's had in months. (Case in point, this week, it's him on the cover of US Weekly.)
IN CONCLUSION:
If this helps Love & Other Drugs' chances at the box office then...er...good job. But I feel like I've watched this one one too many times before. We already know how it ends (and it will end): with him sulking and her writing a radio-ready fairy tale ballad.
Speaking as the target demographic here (for both the film and the two people we're talking about), the report from the ground level is that you're losing us on all counts, and this isn't doing you any favors...
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| Good luck with him, Taylor. |
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