Thursday, September 16, 2010

Today We Take a Stand! (Or, Regarding Jake's Twitter Status and the ISJ Response to the Love & Other Drugs Facebook Page)

If you are a human person with eyes, you already know that when it comes to the internet, Jake Gyllenhaal's personal presence is painfully non-existent.

Luckily for you (and Jake?), my specialty in life is talking incessantly about such inadequacies and then starting ultimately doomed campaigns to bring these complaints to Jake's attention.

Having now been back for five months, and having not yet started even one Ultimately Doomed Campaign, I am so behind with my Ultimately Doomed Campaign Schedule that today I'm launching two (2!).


As Jake's idiotic Twitter impersonator approaches 5,000 followers, I have decided to steal Melsbells129's idea and petition title and CREATE THIS PETITION.

I want you to sign it.  And then I want you to tweet it.  And I want you to see how many people we can get to say that they want Jake Gyllenhaal to create a real Twitter account.  I'll follow up in a week, and if we have enough signatures, I'll send it to Jake's agent and PR firm (yes, I will actually do this).


In response to my various and sundry complaints about the lame-ass Love & Other Drugs Facebook page, we now have our own Love & Other Drugs Facebook page, which is better, and will continue to get better, because more stuff is going to be added to it all the time.

I want you to like it.  And then I want you to get your friends to like it.  And I want you to see if we can get more people to like our page than the official page, at which point I will alert Fox to this fact and show them how much better the fans are doing at covering this movie than they are.

Those are your instructions.  Now go forth, spread the good word, and take down the enemy combatants.  (The "enemy" in question being "people who suck.")  Good day!

1,900 more screencaps at IHJ.  Seriously.  That number is not exaggerated.  MEGA thank you to Katie for being my Facebook minion, and to Vanessa for (as always) providing us with all the goods for it! :)


gyllenhaalisgr8 September 16, 2010 at 12:43 PM  

Okay, posted you on twitter, my facebook homepage and my Gyllenhaal Treasures group page. Do I get a gold star?!

Linda,  September 16, 2010 at 1:16 PM  

are you sure this is all gonna work out??
well, anyway I'm definitely on it :D haha

Becky Heineke September 16, 2010 at 1:20 PM  

gyllenhaalisgr8, TOTAL GOLD STAR! You have fantastic promotional range. :D

And Linda, I'm fairly sure none of this is going to work out. :D But dammit, that doesn't mean I'm not going to try!!

Linda,  September 16, 2010 at 1:30 PM  

That's our PG :)

Leslie September 16, 2010 at 1:48 PM  

Off-topic: my cubie here at work needed some "decorating" so I've hung some SFW pics of JG. You have no idea how many people have come by to see them since they've "heard that Jake is around." OMG - every single woman is swooning. Only one person didn't know his last name.

Sophie,  September 16, 2010 at 2:12 PM  

Okay i dont use twitter but if jake creates one i will! i already joined the facebook page and signed the cause ;)

Lol Leslie i would be there too if i heard that :)

Karolina September 16, 2010 at 3:42 PM  

Okay, I signed it and noted on twitter, and now we have to sit and watch. ;)

CigarattesAndCoffee September 16, 2010 at 3:55 PM  

Signed the petition and liked the facebook page. That's my good deed for the day done.

I know this is completely belated, but I just have to tell everything that I FINALLY came up with one of those connections-to-Jake thing. I found out yesterday that one of my best friends met Gemma Arterton at some drama school, and Gemma gave her some cheese (I have no idea why). So I'm not sure if this means Jake has given me cheese or I've kissed him or he's called me a commoner. Maybe it's all 3. But you were right PG, I did finally get one. *sigh of relief*

Anonymous,  September 16, 2010 at 4:49 PM  

Jake on Twitter, can you image some of the tweets he would get, scary.

Becky Heineke September 16, 2010 at 8:04 PM  

a) Anon, he would get the creepiest shit Twitter has to offer, no question. Also (sadly), he won't join Twitter, no question. But should we stir things up every once in a while to show that we care?? No question. :D

b) CigarattesAndCoffee, I KNEW IT! And yours was an especially awesome one, what with the Gemma connection and all. PLUS CHEESE. Well done!

c) Leslie, the reason that is hilarious is because I just started a personal "page" on Facebook for people to "like" me, and a friend from college wrote on my wall to ask me who the hell Jake Gyllenhaal was. Just when you think the word is getting out... ;D

Lola,  September 16, 2010 at 8:18 PM  

Sadly i can't join either of these causes because 1)I dont have a facebook account and refuse to get one and 2)I really would not like it if Jake got a twitter acount. Sorry i'm being a bad fan:(

gyllenhaalisgr8 September 16, 2010 at 9:07 PM  

I understand, Lola. I would prefer that Jake not tweet either. It's like I have less respect for celebrity tweeters. I'd like to think that his life is busy and fulfilling enough that he needn't resort to this fluff. And we would all be so totally consumed that nothing else would ever get accomplished!

Becky Heineke September 16, 2010 at 9:18 PM  

And all of this is kind of why I was trying to make it a fun way just to reach out more than anything else. If you read the petition, the crux of it is really just a plea to have *something* online with *anything* (even the most basic information) updated about Jake. But I've been asking for that since 2006, and it ain't happened yet...I just wanted to do something fun, that's all! :)

(Starting crazy projects and watching everyone inevitably ignore me is kind of what I'm known for!!)

gyllenhaalisgr8 September 16, 2010 at 9:29 PM  

At least we have our "fake Jake" on twitter, LOL! Somebody pull the effing plug!

KD,  September 16, 2010 at 10:10 PM  

Signed the petition, but I don't have a fb page so...I'll tell my friends about it though.

Sorry for the lack of comments guys. School has been kicking me in the rear with 2 AP classes, PreCalc, Adv. Language, and Cermaics. Plus with work after school...I'm about dead by 8 PM.

Katie,  September 16, 2010 at 11:03 PM  

I can understand the anti-Jake-tweeting stance. Quite frankly I'm glad Jake is the exact opposite of what Chelsea Handler is to Twitter. Somehow I perceive Jake has the "I'm too cool for that" attitude and that just adds to his sexy factor to me. I really only signed the petition to see if this campaign might actually be successful for PG. Here's hoping.

Also, my desktop on my computer is a picture of Jake. I had my computer out in class today and the guy who's been chatting me up the past couple weeks commented on my Jake background. He goes "isn't he doing a biopic right now?" We talked Jake for a minute or two. Now, I'm pretty sure this guy's not gay so I'm thinking I should marry him. At least he might understand when I have a Jake movie on and he needs to make himself scarce. Sounds like a successful marriage to me...LOL

Vanessa September 17, 2010 at 1:11 AM  

OK, signed the petition, liked the new vigilante FB page, so now what can we get ourselves into? I know, MORE JAKE!!! Oh wait, we already have. But it's never enough in my book.

Katie, I totally get that about whoever you marry better be OK with your gorgeous obsession over here. My ex was kinda weird about my last one, so I got rid of him, hah. & I recently discovered my computer can do a constant slideshow on my desktop of my gazillion pics of Jake. So, this is kinda cool, I get to see his beautiful mug in some kind of pose every 10 seconds ALL DAY LONG. I give up, I am just plain hopeless... >:-P

Sam September 17, 2010 at 1:36 AM  

I tell my soon to be husband that he is lucky i crush on Jake, at least he's not "REAL" as in, as if ive ever got a chance. It would be worse if it was the postman of the guy that works at a local bar... it seems to keep him quiet! haha!

Anonymous,  September 17, 2010 at 3:00 AM  

Hi, Prophecy Girl.
You are brave and adorable woman.
Of course I signed the petition and retweet.
And I joined facebook page.

I agree with gyllenhaalisgr8's opinion.
I would prefer that Jake not tweet.
But I hate FAKE jake.


gyllenhaalisgr8 September 17, 2010 at 7:13 AM  

Does anyone remember "vigilantes with vaginas" from Thelma & Louise? Kinda sums most of us up on here, LOL! Vigilenhaalantes?? EEK! I need some air!

gyllenhaalisgr8 September 17, 2010 at 7:18 AM  

Oh, Vanessa, I have that same slide show on my computer at the foot of my bed -- Jake-on-a-loop! It's like bedtime porn! What a way to drift off...!

Leslie September 17, 2010 at 8:17 AM  

I guess we all must have him on desktop slideshow . . . ;D

Vanessa September 17, 2010 at 8:31 AM  

HAHA, "VIGILENHAALANTES"! Too funny, & the funnier thing is I can't even say that out loud without getting tongue tied. Good one, gyllenhaalisgr8. & yes I do remember that from T&L.

OT for a sec, T&L is where I discovered Brad Pitt, too! Yum, still love him after all these years & all them kids. >;-P

Becky Heineke September 17, 2010 at 10:58 AM  

(I'm totally using this as an excuse to annoy Jake's "people." I feel like they haven't heard from me in far too long... :D)

I love it when I have to step away for twelve hours or so and come back to twice as many comments because a hilarious conversation has ensued. HAHA! From future husbands to computer screens to manipulating the English language, this is a fantastic discussion. :D

Thank you to everyone who has signed and "liked" so far!

Anonymous,  September 18, 2010 at 12:31 PM  

I see the "Fabulous Kate" has signed the petition.

Becky Heineke September 18, 2010 at 4:27 PM  

Well, Kate has now been deleted. Though I don't know who she is, to be honest...aside from someone who's just trying to stir things up and doing so using my lame idea to generate enthusiasm for (let's face it) someone who doesn't give a fuck if we're enthusiastic or not.

(That was not bitterness, merely truth. :D)

gyllenhaalisgr8 September 29, 2010 at 7:47 PM  

Don't you know by now that guys don't do ANYTHING unless they think it's THEIR idea?!

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