Dress Like Jake!

With Jake growing his beard out again and Jon Stewart coming back from his July vacation with a little facial hair himself, it seems like everyone is styling themselves after Gylls these days.

And who wouldn't want to dress like Jake Gyllenhaal?  Wait, don't answer that.

Who wouldn't want to dress like Jake Gyllenhaal when someone else had picked out his clothes?  Wait, don't answer that either, 'cause I wouldn't.  But other people might - like guy-people!  And for those people, there is River Island, a clothing company that wants the world to dress like Jake!  (Sidenote:  I wonder if Jake knows they used him on their website last month to sell their clothes.)

The picture above is a screenshot of River Island's website a few weeks ago.  When you clicked on Jake's dapper, sunglass-ed face, you got this:

A complete outfit!  And when you put all of that on an I'm Stalking Jake! reader, you got this:

Nothing Really Matters, MERIT BADGE.  Total and complete merit badge moment here, For Buying an Entire Jake-Inspired Designer Outfit:

Well earned!

While we're on the subject of Jake and his clothing choices, a rather comprehensive look at his wardrobe can be found at THIS LINK, which is full of useful information, like what kind of sunglasses Jake wears, and commentary on his hat choices ("Also I've noticed [as I'm sure his fans have too], Gyllenhaal's love for fedoras").

(As a matter of fact yes, author of this article.  We have noticed Jake's fedora fetish.  And we've been trying to repress it, thank you very much.)

Jake Fashion Tip:  Never leave home without wearing a stained shirt.

This article comes to us courtesy of gyllenhaalisgr8, who, as many of you may already know, is better known for taking Jake's clothes off than dressing him:

And because she's already won a Lifetime Achievement Award, I don't really know what else to say, except that this is the edited version, because I told her my delicate sensitivities couldn't handle that which was originally sent my way...

Thanks to Nothing Really Matters and gyllenhaalisgr8 for waiting through the entire month it took me to post this!  Jesus.