The Jake-Has-Been-Replaced-By-Paul-Bunyan Rumor Gets Traction
Coming out of wooden cabins? Walking through thick foliage? WEARING KHAKIS?!?!!!!
WHO IS THIS MAN.
More pictures of Jake uneasily staring down the picture-taker at the usual spot.
Posts
88 comments:
Oh my God, what is with all the tongue in these photos?! Jake must've been concentrating on something very hard...
I'm cashing my social security check, grabbing my razor and he'd better look out! Until then, I have made the ultimate Jake-stalking video (second in one night; I was a bit loopy...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GltG8W1LKU
Sasquatch really does exist!!!
Big foot or a big six inches?!
^^^ Ladies and gentlemen, SHE'S BACK! ;D
P.S. I'm really sad now I didn't run with the tongue theme and do a lizard post. I have failed at stalking today. :(
My stalking video will give you renewed strength! Hahahaha!
P.S. There is also a new sultry one ***fans herself***!
Inspiration works in mysterious ways: I was watching "Sister Act" when I was prompted to make the silly thing!
gyllenhaalisgr8: As 'Lil Kim says - "under 7 inches . . EH, sorry!"
Love the tongue action!!!
Jeez, aside from the atrocity that defines his beard, what's going on with all that tongue action? It's like his safety blanket. Don't know what face to make for the 'razzi? Stick my tongue out! Walking? Stick my tongue out! Crossing the street! Stick my tongue out.
It's so distracting! *GOES CRAZY*
Wow, should have just ditto'd CigarattesAndCoffee's comment. I need to read the comments before I comment.
Hey PG - now YOU'RE being quoted as a source (read the comments of this article) HERE!
He's killing my quiver. Slowly, but surely. :/
^^^ NO!! Don't say it. He'll come back. He always does!!!
@Leslie WOW, I'm famous! :D That's very exciting! I've gotten so much mileage from that post. Jake, wherever you are, I would like to dedicate this victory to you for growing your beard out so I could call you a werewolf. :)
Leslie...I would default to making an exception for Mr. G...and with that tongue he has, we would probably not even notice!!
Bubby in flip-flops! I bet he has such cute feet. Is it terrible that I kind of like the khakis? But I definitely do not like the shirt. At all.
wow, he looks so tribal, ive never seen him like this!!! Gylls whats going on??
Dayumm, he just looks sooo wild & wooly. Geez, I wonder how much longer that beard might actually get??? If he doesn't cut it soon, he really will look like THIS
>;-P
The beard is all the buzz!
Seen this PG?
http://www.celebuzz.com/battle-beards-robert-pattinson-vs-s245351/
Unfortunately Jake's losing again...
I had *not* seen that, Lena!! Why does Rob Pattison insist on TORTURING ME with his continued existence?!??? Rob Pattison WISHES he could grow a beard like Jake Gyllenhaal's...
I will continue to vote, regardless of how feeble my efforts may be. :-/
Yes it's sad isn't it. Pattz's beard looks like something pasted on (badly).
I think people don't even LOOK at the photos anymore, they've all been programmed to automatically click on the name RPattz whenever it appears anywhere for whatever reason.
Damn those Twimoms...
You know, after careful examination of these photos *cough* . . and if I were a betting girl . . I'd have to wager that he's wearing no underwear here. Yes, methinks Sir Gyllenhaal is goin' commando here ladies.
*swoon*
Speaking of which . . .
Have we had the debate about boxers v. briefs yet? ;}
[I can NOT believe I just typed this . . if you read this Jake - I'M SO SORRY!]
Great idea for a debate, Leslie!
I personally want to see commando, but if I can't have that, then briefs would be my choice, or can we vote for bikini briefs instead??? >;-P
You know, Vanessa, at this point I wouldn't put anything past him! Is he on a mission or something?
What IS that little pink ball on the tip of Jake's tongue?? I won't say what it looks like, but it rhymes with Dolores....
Well after further examination of THIS picture, I swear it made me really think of bigfoot HERE
Sad, but true...
Oh Sir Jake, why hast thou forsaken the Gyllenhaalics of the world? Just because the stupid critics dissed your PoP look isn't a good enough reason to become a Yeti. If you feel you MUST shapeshift, then please make it a werewolf, not Sasquatch, thank you.
I'm going for the commando option too.
And we already know his friend is Sasquatch (Jimmy Kimmel interview), so he's probably the werewolf.
Hi there! Just wanted to let you know that I chose I'm Stalking Jake as one of my recommended blogs for this Blog Day! =)
PS: my blog is in Portuguese.
Well, the debate is more like . . what do you think he wears? Personally, I think he's got the tight boxers goin' on . . most likely black but sometimes grey or white. Kinda like THESE.
OMFG, Leslie, yeah, I LOVE those skin tight boxers! & sorry I misunderstood the debate. I was thinking more along the lines of what I WANT to see him wear! >;-)
But as far as WHAT he is wearing underneath those pants, then I would want to say most likely they are body hugging, since there doesn't seem to be any sign of anything showing through, maybe he IS commando after all! ^_^
Vanessa - I don't think it's a matter of what we want to see him wear . . but what we'd like to see him take off!! LOL
[Still not believing I'm actually commenting about this kind of stuff publicly! *blushing*]
Oh, Leslie, you are SO right! Haha, yes, Jake, PLEASE take it OFF!!!
& no worries, Leslie, what happens on ISJ "STAYS" on ISJ! (well, that's not really true, but oh well, that's what makes this place so much fun!)
>;-P
Nathália, I left you a comment on your blog, but I want to say here too that I'm so honored you included me among all those other amazing blogs!! Thanks for recommending me! :D And thanks for reading!!!
AS FOR BIGFOOT, Vanessa, believe it or not, that picture was the first thing I thought of when I saw that picture! And now we have THIS from gyllenhaalisgr8. Great Jake fans think alike... ;D
As for the underwear discussion, all I will say is that you're totally safe. Much more scandalous things have been discussed in the name of Jake...you guys haven't even made me blush yet! If he really ain't wearing anything in these, well, let's just say that's not the first time that's happened. ;)
Oh & here is how I like to see him dressed & I would bet he is most likely commando under THESE
SEE? OH MY GOD, YEAH... >:-O
HAHAHA, LMFAO! Thanks for that link, PG, gyllenhaalisgr8, you did exactly what I pictured! GREAT JOB!!! >;-P
Vanessa: OMFG!!! (I'm peeking through my fingers!)
PG: And you know this . . HOW??? ;} (Bike shorts aside)
^^^ ONLY because I have spent many years around people who bring these things to my attention, of course! *ahem* ;D
Seriously, I can't believe gyllenhaalisgr8 hasn't come forward yet with the infamous pictures from that OTHER TIME he wore khakis... :)
You mean this one PG?
Oh my god, I can't believe I'm posting about this too!
I seriously just picked myself up off the floor
Although this is um. Um. Hm. I'll just leave this here.
NOW I'm blushing. ;D
(And yes, CigarattesAndCoffee, the first picture was exactly the one of I was thinking off!!)
O.M.G. How in the hell am I ever going to be able to keep my mind out of the gutter & on work now??? Thanks a LOT, C&C! Heehee, oh but WHAT a luscious distraction, RIGHT?
I LOVE this place, ISJ truly rocks! You guys are a scream! >;-)
Hard to believe, but the comments outdid the original post this time :D
I see Natalie was wrong about the alopecia, lol
Well, outdoing the original post wouldn't have been hard this time... :D But I agree that the comments were WAY above average!
CAC: Now THAT'S what I was talking about when I said put the Jarhead blu-ray on slow-mo!!!!! Can I say I've already seen this . . in motion . . over a few hundred times???
Ohhhhhhh myyyyyyyy *melting*
Is that Jarhead picture really Jake? It's hard to see the face???
Okay.
CigarattesAndCoffee: Thanks for posting my shower pic! Maybe someone is actually visiting my Treasures!
S4M985: Even in steam, you cannot mistake the shape of Jake's head (the top one).
Vanessa: Thanks for liking big foot!
Leslie: I have only seen him [photoed] in Calvin Klein. I'm betting they're tighty-whities, because God knows Jake needs the support!
PG: Thanks for posting my Big Foot Jake pic! :^)> (<-Jake with beard). And about that "other" khaki pic, it's EVERYWHERE (like even my cell phone wallpaper!). I never posted this, and Stephen will probably kill me, but I just uploaded it for all of you:
http://twitpic.com/2k4nrz
Now I'm going to hide under the bed.
P.S. Tell me when you have all seen the crotch montage and maybe I can delete it before Stephen gets wind of it! Oh, what the hell -- he knows I'm totally insane (about his baby boy)!
FYI, I have now made 34 Jake YouTube videos (and a couple for Heath)! Did I just say insane? Guilty as charged!
No...wait...not obsessed...just thorough!
gyllenhaalisgr8, I never knew that was your photo! It was just being posted around Tumblr :)
C&C: I mean, it's a screen capture, but I take plain Jake photos and work them graphically. I really played with it to see "the main subject" at its best! And I also add text to plain photos to make them more special, more poster-like. PG has my Gyllenhaal Treasures at the sidebar; besides twitpic and flickr, that's their real home!
I see the crotch shot survived on Twitter overnight! :D Ah, don't worry, gyllenhaalisgr8. I don't think Stephen would surprised by anything at this point!! ;D
Crotch shotS. Plural. Definitely plural!!
PG...I've been thinking a LOT about showing you my X-rated ones. I have never posted them anywhere near the internet, so if I emailed them to you, you would have to delete or eat (let me rephrase that, LOL!). But they are AWE-SOME.
Does dad have a penchant for getting inflamed or something?
Leslie...it might be paranoia on my part, but I KNOW he's protective of Jake in the public eye. But if you think I'm bad here, I'm worse on twitter, and since he follows my tweets, I'm FUCKED!
gyllenhaalsisgr8: No, you just wish you were ;}
HAHAHAHA -- depends which Gyllenhaal we're talking about here! :^p
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