Jake Gyllenhaal *Very Concerned* About the Quality of Fake Jakes on Twitter

Just look at this face:

If that's not the face of someone distraught over half-assed Twitter impersonators, I don't know what is!

Being the person who literally wrote the book on Fake Jakes on social networking sites, I share Jake's concern.

The latest moderately-successful Twitter-Jake was the tiresome "JBGyllenhaal" who, like the good fake that he was, sounded absolutely nothing like Jake, attracted hordes of followers anyway, and then was kicked off Twitter for being lame.  Now he has reinvented himself as (I'm not kidding) JBGyllenhaal2, so don't follow him, because even for a Fake Jake, that's a really stupid Twitter name.

Also to be put on your No Follow List:

1.  "Mirkinsrock," who fails our authenticity test because he appears to be an idiot.

2.  "MrGyllenhaal," who looks to be a fan of BobVila.com.  We won't follow him because that's just sad.

3.  "jake_gyllenhaal," who does nothing except post paparazzi pictures and write tweets to himself.  I'm not convinced this person understands Twitter (although, to be fair, who among us does?).

Indeed, the sad fact is that while the medium of social networking may have changed over the years, the quality of Fake Jakes has not.  The best way to determine if the Jake you're following on Twitter is real is this:  IT'S NOT.

(Though if you were looking for an example, THIS is the level of devotion we should all learn to expect from Jake when it comes to communing with us lowly beings on the internet.)